Here is some interesting copy from a flight school's website. See if you can spot the irony:

"After you have learned some basic maneuvers, taken a pre-solo written test, and learned to land safely, your instructor will suddenly, one day, exit the airplane and tell you to do three take-offs and landings."

Holy Sh*t!!! What, does he wear a parachute? This reminds me of the scene from Congo where they are trying to get the girl to jump out of the plane and tell her that she can stay, but the pilot and copilot have already jumped. The text goes on to say:

"As he walks away, you will sense that you are about to cross an important threshold. You are leaving the nest for the first time. When you taxi back to the terminal, you will feel exhilaration, a sense of accomplishment, and perhaps for the first time the realization that you WILL be a pilot. As you step out of the aircraft, your instructor and a pair of scissors will meet you. Your instructor will “cut the tails of your shirt”; actually the back of it."

Ok, so he actually walks out of the plane. Not quite as exciting, but hey, at least you will still get the exhilaration, sense of accomplishment, and realization that YOU WILL BE A PILOT!
posted by Rich at 7:17 AM Comments

 
I'll admit it: I'm an air travel snob. I was in the air for 60,000 actual flight miles last year. For frame of reference, that is 12 round trips from New York to LA. That's 144 hours IN the air. So, for this, I expect certain things from the airlines in return. They give me their Elite Frequent Flier status, mileage incentives, free upgrades, etc. Yesterday I had to flex the Elite muscle. I was just trying to get home from North Carolina, and the entire Eastern US was shut down. So I got on a flight, even managing to switch the airport I was supposed to leave from without paying a change fee. Then I asked if there were seats available in First Class, and they said no. On each segment, there WERE! Those were supposed to be mine, and instead they were empty, and I was flying in the middle seat, with no free cocktails in my hand! How dare they? If they aren't careful, I will just, I don't know, I'll just.... Oh wait, what else can I do? Drive? Take the bus? Bastards.
posted by Rich at 3:39 PM Comments